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May 2011
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Play Ball!

Could not pass up sharing this release in its entirety with you…


One Hitters Burned Again By Timid Czardinals

Office of National Drug Control Policy Backs Out of Softball Game with Drug Policy Reformers

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Once again, the softball team representing the Office of National Drug Control Policy (ONDCP) has backed out of playing a Congressional Softball League game against the One Hitters, a team consisting of members of several drug policy reform organizations and others who support ending the “war on drugs.” A game between the two teams had been scheduled for May 25, but the ONCDP Czardinals pulled out shortly after scheduling the game, with ONDCP public liaison coordinator Quinn Staudt citing an “accidental double-booking.”

This is not the first time the Czardinals have refused to play the One Hitters. In 6 years, the team found one reason or another to avoid taking the field against this team of individuals dedicated to reforming the out-of-date and ineffectual policies promoted by the ONDCP.

This behavior is being mimicked on the national stage by the ONDCP as well. While drug czar Gil Kerlikowske has stated that he will no longer use the rhetoric of a “war on drugs” and President Obama said that he wants to move to treat drug abuse as a health problem rather than a criminal justice problem, little has been seen in the way of action in that direction. The President has also said that he does not support the legalization of any drug, even marijuana, despite the inarguable damage marijuana prohibition does to society, individual users, medical patients that benefit from marijuana treatments, governmental budgets, and respect for the rule of law.

“It is really disappointing that the ONDCP not only refuses to have an honest debate with drug policy reformers about the absolute failure of drug prohibition, but also keeps ducking out of softball games with us,” said One Hitters team captain Jacob Berg. “We think it would be a great opportunity to advance the discussion between drug law reformers and the people ostensibly in charge of drug policy in this country. I wonder if they are afraid to have that conversation. The drug czar said ‘legalization’ isn’t in his vocabulary, but it’s just a friendly softball game!”

The One Hitters hope the Czardinals will put aside ideological differences and accept their invitation to play a softball game this summer on the National Mall in Washington, DC.

The One Hitters is a co-ed softball team established in 2002
in the Congressional League in Washington, DC comprised of individuals
who work for or support marijuana and other drug law reform.

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18 comments to Play Ball!

  • ezrydn

    It’s easy to understand why they ducked and ran. Just answer one question they probably asked themselves:

    What would be the “message” if the On Hitters WON?

    It would go against their job description.

  • chuck

    I’ve been doing this forever, it seems. Why would anyone, including me, do this—meaning, repeal of draconian laws? Frankly, I’m “fed”-up. You got Capt whatever the name is saying, “yeah, just a matter of time, money will be an issue”…bla bla bla. In this person’s way, I can’t even get an email from the person…Whatever. Fear!
    You got people so afraid now, like Capt whatever, it doesn’t matter at all. Like I wrote to Capt, nothing will change, not in the next 20 years at least. Quit fooling yourselves, this is a control and conquer issue: waste of time. If some being has the inclination to change something on the federal level, you will fail.
    Nothing will change. Are people just so polluted that they think with all their education and bs, that meaningful change will come? I want it to get worse. Only then will we have direct democracy via more death—but that’s how it goes, right?

    • darkcycle

      Nothing changes, eh, chuck? Well, “chuck” this out:
      Argentina Supreme Court rules personal use not punishable:
      I love Argentina, the Mountains, the desert, the weed….the freedom.

      • Duncan20903

        Wasn’t that where Mr. Hitler lived after retiring from being der Fuhrer?

        Seriously I’ve looked into Argentina. That was about a decade ago, but back then you could rent an elite level home for $250, the cost of living was simply dirt on the dollar compared to the US. The major drawbacks that I found were that the southern part of the country is infested with penguins, and everybody who lives there speaks a foreign language.

    • hmmmm “nothing will change, not in the next 20 years at least.”

      needs a minor edit: nothing will change, not in the next 20 years at least, unless we pull everybody into a coherent whole focused on a common goal.

      there, that’s much better.

  • Duncan20903

    Oh for the love of… that is the definition of petty. The boneheads forfeit for refusing to play, right?

    Even Hearst is moving into the 21st century. Hopefully the principals of won’t get blindsided by the headline “3rd graders targeted by illegal drug cartel end up in emergency room after eating ChronicCandy, 4 die, irreversible brain damage for the rest! One grade school teacher says in interview, ‘we were just lucky there were no axe murders!'”

    “Hearst said, hey, that’s the way we publicize mary wauna, what’s the problem?”

    “ Announces Partnership with Hearst Media Services / Bay Area”

  • darkcycle

    FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE, May 25, 2011,
    “NOPE. Not gonna debate you (we know we’d lose). Not gonna acknowledge you (we rigged the last Facebook forum, it didn’t work, but we tried). Not gonna play a game that signifies nothing but being a good sport (in case you haven’t noticed, we’re NOT good sports, we’re nasty, vindictive and we’re bad losers, so don’t even try). We’re gonna spend that day in our offices, looking outside at the beautiful sunshine, and pretending to have important work to do. Then we’re going home and kick our dogs, berate our wives and spent the rest of the night grumbling that “it’s a stupid game anyway”.”

  • lefty mongtard

    I thought Chicago Jesus was gonna legalize and give me a pony. Gil says no? Well shucks.

  • darkcycle

    Man, the trolls are thick. Call the exterminator, Pete, we gotta spray again. What have I told you people about leaving food out on the couch? Cripes, they smell, too. EEYYYCCHH!

    • Duncan20903

      What is the most frequent final thought that crosses a mouse or a rat’s mind? “Mmmm, that smells gooo-ood!”

      You know DC all things considered this forum doesn’t attract much vermin. Pete doesn’t have a single resident troll. Well more accurately none from the other side’s dugout. Almost all of them just hit and run, and they don’t even come back to argue.

      • darkcycle

        Too true, Duncan. But, to be fair, would YOU want to stick around and debate this lot? Me, I’ll take a pass on that.

      • darkcycle

        Based on the number of Rats, the units of rat poison sold worldwide (estimated) and the number of domestic cats…I’d bet the last thing a rat would likely think would be something like “HMMM, Kinda smells like cat in here…”

  • Paul

    Totally off topic here, but has anyone noticed the California prison system’s travails with the Supreme Court? Very entertaining!

  • kaptinemo

    “Almost all of them just hit and run, and they don’t even come back to argue.”

    As my Old Man used to, I call the practice. ‘Sh*t n’ git’. Like poorly house-trained pups, they enter, crap on the rug, and run out the door before you can grab them by the scruff of their neck and rub their noses in their mess. Too cowardly to stay and defend their positions, as they know they’re indefensible, and don’t want to risk ‘losing face’…just like the Czardinals.

    Which is why I accuse such professional prohibs of possessing a Confucian sense of morality, not a Christian one; they’ll only apologize for their transgressions when they’re caught out, and not because they’re wrong from the beginning.

    • kaptinemo

      Case in point: the Billion-with-a-‘B” dollars the ONDCP not only wasted on their foolish campaign to propagandize American youth, but they also got took to the cleaners by the ad agency that they hired.

      When the Office of Management and Budget tried to determine the effectiveness of the program, they found that, if anything, it may have actually induced teens to try cannabis and other illicit drugs.

      Just think of all the things we could have done with that money before the Meltdown. Now think of all the things we could do with that money right frakkin’ now.

      All gone, p*ssed into the wind…or ad agency exec’s pockets. All OUR money, gone. And that’s just one billion out of the estimated TRILLION dollars wasted so far since 1969.

      Did they ever apologize to the American people for that horrendously expensive farce? (Crickets chirping) Thought so…

    • darkcycle

      Nemo, You could look at that behavior this way: It’s kinda like farting in an elevator just as the doors open and you leave. You just walk away fast and hope they don’t remember your face. Most people don’t turn around and waive.
      Waiting around for the stink to rise isn’t what the troll had in mind.

      • Duncan20903

        You can get put in jail in Malawi for farting in public. Malawians are quickly becoming experts in the “one cheek sneak” technique.

        The new criminal charge of farting in public has inspired scores a Malawian protests. Evidently the Malawians very much enjoy farting, presumably other people’s as well.

        I swear that news video linked above could be posted by The Onion and everyone would think it fiction.

        But frankly, after further reflection I’d rather have the lawmakers arguing over things like farting in public or bestiality. It’s certainly one way to keep them out of real mischief.