The Daily Telegraph:
It surfaces each summer — in fly-by-night rickety booths at county fairs and amusement parks while police turn a blind eye. For a mere handful of change, even the youngest of children can get their fix. It’s a horrifying sight, watching 8-year-old girls suddenly supercharged out of control, their hearts beating wildly and their limbs flung every which way as they race through the crowds.
Hot on the heels of her shocking on-camera experience last week shooting up the main ingredient in skunk as a cautionary tale against cannabis use, journalist Nicky Taylor will do the unthinkable: This week, live, on camera, she will inject herself with the main ingredient in…cotton candy
Yes, that seductive confectionary of youth, made appealing to the youngest in it’s soft-spun stickiness in nursery colors of pink and blue and yellow.
Miss Taylor will then be filmed as the effects of the drug take hold. Dr Paul Morrison, one of the scientists in charge of the programme, told The Daily Telegraph: “I can’t talk about the experiences of any of our participants without their say-so. I don’t know what she’ll specifically be injecting. Cotton candy is really just an intense little bit of sugar and a lot of… air. If she injects air into her veins, well that could be a bit shocking to viewers.”
Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary, refused to speculate on the number of young people currently injecting cotton candy. “Anything we can do to protect the lives of our children is worth it. We must not be swayed by those who would destroy our society by allowing such substances to remain legally available.”
Next Week: If Nicky Taylor survives her cotton candy trip, she will inject herself with the main ingredient in bullshit.