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September 2011
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We the people

Happy Constitution Day.

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8 comments to We the people

  • Swooper420

    You notice that there is no Hoopla or Speachifying or any kind of ‘official’ notice of Constitution Day. Why doesn’t that surprise me?

  • Francis

    [a far away look in his eyes, remembering] Oh, yeah… the Constitution. I love historical holidays.

  • Francis

    You know how it can be sort of comforting to read a book you’ve already read or watch a movie you’ve already seen, because you know exactly how it’s going to play out? I think that might be why I decided to read the comments on this cnn story about yet another act of horrific violence by Mexican drug cartels. Let’s see if they covered all the bases.

    1. Rhetorical questions exposing the commenter’s inability to distinguish between consensual activities and acts of violence? CHECK. “sprngfldxd45: Prostitution, slavery, cocaine, heroin… should we legalize all that?” (Hmmm… one of those things is not like the others. Can you spot it?)

    2. Calls for the U.S. to invade Mexico? (Because apparently we’re not currently involved in enough wars.) CHECK. “damyou: WE INVADED IRAQ IN PURSUIT OF BIOLOGICAL WEAPONS RIGHT ?, WELL WE SHOULD INVADE MEXICO AND COLUMBIA IN PERSUIT TO DESTROY THE COCO FEILDS,BECAUSE BOTH DESTROY HUMANS” (So a cheap joke about “coco feilds” is obviously obligatory, e.g., ‘what does this guy have against chocolate?’ But the really impressive stupidity is using the example of the Iraq invasion TO SUPPORT his call for–not one, but TWO–new invasions. *dramatic slow clap*)

    3. Calls for vigilante justice? CHECK. “chemicalbank: I wish some kind of avenging warrior would take out a few narcos every time their violence affects anyone but other narcos. Just pick a few at random each time – low level, high level – whatever the low-hanging fruit is that day. One special forces type sniper could throw this stuff right back in their faces.”

    4. Calls to dispense with those pesky rights of the accused? (Because obviously the problem is that people have TOO MANY rights.) CHECK. “Rotten: These low life scum bags that are in the Cartels should be treated as such. Not given the same rights as you every day criminals. You start killing them on site.When you arrest 20 of them ,you line them up and shoot them.Then you will get some respect.”

    5. Super-persuasive rebuttals by drug-warriors responding to commenters advocating drug legalization as a means for reducing violence? CHECK. (Warning guys, this comment may change your views on the drug war.) “LetsDance: Very, very naive view. ‘Legalization’ will do nothing to stop the turf-wars between the producers, cartels, the pushers, or the smugglers and blood will continue to flow.” (Yes, that’s the entirety of the comment and no, I have no idea why he felt the need to use scare quotes around “legalization.”)

    6. Blaming illicit drug users for prohibition-related violence? CHECK. “2011cnn2011: Drug users are just as much to blame for these murders..you are all an accessory to murder”

    7. Racism? (Do you really need me to answer that one?) CHECK. “chubbygob69: Mexicans aren’t smart enough, well maybe but they ARE corrupt enough.”

    8. Random unintended hilarity? CHECK. “JayChris: I think that every Mexican [law abiding] household should own a handgun & AR15 or battle rifle and respond accordingly to the threats made by these low life cartels. They force small towns [pueblos] in Mexico to “pay protection money” and terrorize them when they can’t. My prayers are with our neighbors.” (I just LOVE the “pueblo” parenthetical. It called to mind this quote – Tina: “Pedro is working on an ‘adobe.’ Can you say that with me?” Bonus points to whoever recognizes the movie!)

  • darkcycle

    Wow. Now THERE’S an IDEA…one day a year where the Constitution is again the law of the land! Think about it, what a wonderful way to honor the memory of the Constitution…one day a year when it is actually in full force!

    • Francis

      Are you crazy darkcycle?! If we gave people a taste of freedom, they might become addicted and start to demand it all the time. Way, way too dangerous.

  • vickyvampire

    We the Democrats think the economy is going get better it really is someday and we the Republicans think we live in a Free country yeah, right you fools.and the Libertarians are saying told you so.