FBI meets reality

Potential FBI Hackers Smoking Weed Before Interviews Triggers No Drugs Policy Review

The FBI has admitted that it is considering relaxing its strict rules against drug taking, in a bid to try to encourage more hackers to work for them in the ongoing war against cybercrime.

On Monday, FBI Director James B Comey told an audience at the White Collar Crime Institute annual conference in New York City that the FBI wants to build up its cybercrime unit by filling 2,000 new jobs this year, but has had problems when seeking to hire promising young hackers.

“I have to hire a great work force to compete with those cyber criminals and some of those kids want to smoke weed on the way to the interview,” Comey said, according to the Wall Street Journal.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

35 Responses to FBI meets reality

  1. thelbert says:

    if i were smoking the herb on the way to secret police headquarters, i might just get some sense in my headquarters and turn around and look for an honest job.

  2. Nunavut Tripper says:

    Amazing how they make up the rules at their own convenience.

  3. thelbert says:

    it’s almost the same as the gestapo hiring jews in order to round up more jews.

  4. Tony Aroma says:

    Looks like when it comes to the government requiring suspicionless drug tests, it’s more of a “do as we say, not as we do” sort of thing. At least if they want to attract the best programmers and hackers.

  5. Jean Valjean says:

    And yet, with this exception, the drug war rumbles on….hundreds of thousands are arrested every year, lives and careers are ruined, families are broken up, the sick are hounded and imprisoned, meanwhile fortunes are made by drug war profiteers and criminal gangs…plus ca change…

  6. claygooding says:

    So,,,now i guess we will hear that marijuana lowers your IQ enough to join the FBI as a hacker.
    That will scare more people away from using marijuana than the threat of arrest.

  7. “We can’t have them thinking out of the box…I mean, how would that look to the ineffective, straight-edge agents?”

    Does Comey actually collect a check?

  8. allan says:

    mind boggling incongruities. ya just can’t make this shit up!

    • Duncan20903 says:

      I wish people could create this as fiction because that would mean this stuff might not be real.

  9. thelbert says:

    i have heard that without pot smokers to do the clerical chores the prison system would collapse of its own weight. the other inmates and guards are not up to the task. i have never done time so i can’t swear to it. seems that the fbi isn’t up to the task either. does anybody on the couch know if the prisons depend on potheads to keep going?

  10. darkcycle says:

    “…but we’re bound and determined to keep marijuana illegal for the rest of you pathetic serfs.”
    No hypocrisy to see here, folks, move along….

  11. Jean Valjean says:

    More crystal ball gazing from Jonathan P. Caulkins… OOOO! the Walmart of pot is coming.

    • B. Snow says:

      I have a number of issues w/ this article – starting with:

      A decade or so down the road, when the for-profit marijuana farming sector approaches the efficiency of tomato or pepper farmers, the production cost for a joint’s worth of basic, high-potency intoxicant, which runs about $4 today, will drop to about a nickel.

      Beyond that he seems take Marky-Mark & the Prohib-Bunch seriously, The idea that we should attempt to establish a minimum price = a floor value for it…

      He mentions this as if it’s merely to maintain a steady tax/revenue stream from it = to be able to do all the things Pols are promising to do. They’re gonna make some bargain/compromise/deal – aka “Find Common Ground”… *hurl* -sorry.
      I hate that wussyfied phrase that’s a message to the far right that they (Repubs) won’t comprise their ideology – allegedly based on “morals”, “values”, “bigotry”, Etc. They only want to do stuff where the Venn Diagrams overlap – and that space is already teeny-tiny.

      And, as unusual many Dems are quite often, over-willing to compromise. They can’t seem unable to haggle well-enough to save their supper, and they losing their lunch money to the bullies – before the damn haggling ever gets started.
      And – Of Course – almost all Repubs & Dems are willing ignoring the “Angry Middle”, Heaven Forbid they actually give anybody the finger in public (so to speak), they over estimate the Two major parties long-term existence.

      And there’s one bit I Bolded that pisses me off to NO END!

      Allowing organizations to produce, distribute, and sell marijuana but restricting that privilege to nonprofits is better than the Colorado and Washington strategies in almost every respect. In fact, the only people who should prefer commercial marijuana enterprises are those who themselves hope to make millions operating businesses, or hardcore libertarians who don’t believe that government should interfere in a consumer’s right to harm himself through his own bad choices.

      That isn’t “hardcore libertarian”, I mean Those Folks (H.C.-L’s) want to get rid of stop signs & speed-limits, and eminent domain for highways or other public building/facilities. And shrink, shutdown, & “downsize” as much of the government they can. Only stopping just before the point – where they believe anarchy may start to threaten their Wealth. Or, some “Rogue State” could wipe out life on Earth (or at least large chunks of it!)

  12. HEADQUARTERS says:

    Nein! :censored: Ja! :censored: Gehnuchtzuschnachhen! :censored: :censored: Arbeit Macht Frei! :censored: :censored: We Are Not A Crook!

  13. primus says:

    Somehow, crying out about ‘big marijuana’ doesn’t have the same prohibitionist cachet as ‘assassin of youth’. Not nearly as big and scary, is it?

  14. LA SANTA SEDE says:

    “Rome, May 21 – Rome Mayor Ignazio Marino on Wednesday told a drug-policy conference that he supported the legalization of marijuana in Italy.
    “I am in favour of the possibility of deregulating cannabis for medical or personal use,” Marino said at the Eighth Annual Conference of the International Society for the Study of Drug Policy.
    Earlier this month parliament approved a law that overhauls Italy’s drugs laws and reclassifies marijuana as a soft rather than a hard narcotic, with lighter penalties for offenders. “

    qui è

  15. Howard says:

    The FBI isn’t the only hiring entity that’s going to have to consider dropping the ‘cannabis-free-pee’ requirement. I keep hearing that up and coming job seekers aren’t interested in the rules and restrictions so many of us begrudgingly accepted all these years. Have to sit in a cubicle all day? Surely you jest. Can’t work from home? Forget it. Stay put for 30 years in the same job? You must be kidding (although that concept has been fading for a while anyway).

  16. euntesglobal says:

    A few weeks earlier, writing on The Daily Blog website, Ms Hulse had written of her recent change of mind over marijuana use. Until then she had been against legalising it, believing “we have enough trouble with alcohol”.

    However, “we cannot pretend that we can solve the issues by pushing them underground, the alternative is challenging but I think we are ready for the debate.

    The need to escape our day-to-day life via a variety of chemical substances is as old as humanity, let’s get over the prejudice and on with finding a humane way forward”.

    In March, she says she joined her “fellow Westies” in a march through Henderson about the impact of “legal highs” on the community. She didn’t share the call to ban the products, but did share her fellow marchers’ concern “for the impact on our community of these synthesised chemical cocktails on our vulnerable, young and poor”.

    Over recent months, she has found herself advocating for a major change in the legal status of marijuana “as a result of talking to users, doctors, community workers and long-time smokers of organic marijuana. The overwhelming consensus is that, compared with the chemically synthesised, variably manufactured psychoactive substances, organic marijuana is a way less damaging option”.


    • Duncan20903 says:


      What is it that these nitwits are talking about when they say the word “escaping”? It sure couldn’t be any of the commonly accepted definitions.

      It’s almost as peculiar as the dolts who swear that re-legalization is a liberal plot to make the populace contented and compliant so they can implement their policies. It’s especially quaint when they do so in a comments column where the cannabis law reform advocates are rousing the rabble. On which planet in what alternate universe are the fans of cannabis compliant and contented with the government?

      I’ve got an idea! Let’s play “Ask the Prohibitionist!”

      Q) Mr. Prohibitionist, Mr. Prohibitionist, how many prohibitionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

      A) None. Aren’t the liboralz always yapping about saving the environment, now they want us to burn more energy with lightbulbs? Isn’t that just like a liboral?

  17. free radical says:

    April Fools!

    Apparently Comey was joking when he made that entirely reasonable statement about hiring users of cannabis. He must have a dry humor.


    • Tony Aroma says:

      That’s good news! At least for the hackers. It means the FBI won’t be hiring the best and brightest. Which means computer criminals will always be a few steps ahead of their less-capable but law-abiding law-enforcement counterparts.

      • Tony Aroma says:

        Too late to edit!

        Just thinking it’s a bit ironic that their main concern is enforcing the Controlled Substances Act, yet that very same act will insure they aren’t able to hire the best people to enforce it.

  18. tensity1 says:

    I read this story about the FBI at another source, which had an update saying that the person in charge of policy at the FBI told a senator from AL that he didn’t say he would change policy. Basically, “not on my watch.”

    LOL, good luck with your cyber-sleuthing!

  19. allan says:

    well it seems Calvina needs our help (please use all proper cautions when viewing) in telling Congress pot is good for the country.

    Help Stop Dangerous Pro-Marijuana Amendments!


    On May 28, members of the U.S. House of Representatives are expected to debate and vote on a bill that funds the Department of Justice and Drug Enforcement Administration. Amendments are expected to be offered to prohibit any funds from being used to enforce federal law in states that have legalized “medical marijuana.” These amendments have a very real chance of passing — unless your Member of Congress hears from you.


    If passed, these amendments would bar the Department of Justice and its Drug Enforcement Administration from spending any funds to enforce federal law related to marijuana in states that have passed “medical marijuana” initiatives. This amendment would totally undermine federal enforcement efforts related to marijuana, especially given that “medical marijuana” states are not adequately monitoring, regulating, or enforcing their own marijuana laws.


    Please both call your Member of Congress! It is imperative that members of Congress hear loud and clear from concerned citizens across the country that the Rohrabacher-Farr and other amendments would undermine the ability of federal agencies to enforce federal marijuana laws when necessary.

    The system allows you to automatically send a sample letter on this issue to your legislators by using this link:

    When calling, ask to speak directly to the Member or to their
    legislative director about this issue — your Representative can be reached by calling the Capitol Switchboard at 202-225-3121. YOUR


    Please contact your Members of Congress through CapWiz and by
    phone IMMEDIATELY.

    For more information on important drug policy issues,
    please visit http://www.saveoursociety.org

    • Duncan20903 says:

      Would someone please hack into that server and change the sample letter ever so slightly?

      • allan says:

        there’s the beauty of it, if you submit your own, you get to edit it to your satisfaction.

    • kaptinemo says:

      Don’t you just love it when they are forced to go on the defensive?

      The prohibs aren’t good at it (they have to lie about both their rationale and the subject), their target audience they have a script for (vanishingly few under the age of 50; who do you think Calvina is addressing, hmmmm?) is literally dying off, the one they desperately need to agree with them doesn’t (because they heard the lies all through school and know the truth) and is voting for re-legalization.

      The fig leaf (The Children) they were able to use for a generation has fallen away (as in the kids grew up) to reveal what’s always been behind cannabis prohibition, namely bureaucratic empire building and no small amount of croney capitalism on the side.

      Calvina might as well stand in the middle of a cemetery and harangue the headstones, for all the good it will do. She’s run out of willing, sentient listeners.

      • Duncan20903 says:


        I think that I might enjoy taking a vacation in Florida on the first Wednesday of November with the objective of ridiculing and belittling Ms. Fay. Hey Calvina, if you can’t even win with the home field advantage you need to find a new job! Oh my, is that Kev Kev riding around in your purse? Oh, he’s such a cute little lap…ouch, gosh darn it, the little peckerhead bit me!

  20. Dano says:

    Yeah, Comey said he was just trying to be funny. The still won’t allow anyone that has smoked in the last 3 years to join the FBI. Guess they don’t care about reality after all…

  21. Russell Olausen says:

    This is pure Hope. Half the equation.

  22. Nick says:

    “To hell with the budget, hire more Government workers.” -FBI

  23. claygooding says:

    I think they need a bureaucracy that thinks up mew letter gangs every week so they can crank up another bed of corruption and waste,,,at least we would all eventually have health care.
    The idea of 1/2 the population being prisoners and the other half being guards is getting closer every day,

  24. jean valjean says:

    comey at fbi says it was a “joke”. ha ha ha

Comments are closed.