Indoor drug lab discovered at White House

The desire for recreational drugs is an ongoing part of human nature, and people will go to great lengths to obtain them, including manufacturing these drugs themselves in their homes.

Of course, governments go all out in their zeal to crush these attempts, from summarily cutting off the power of homes even suspected of using too much electricity, to taking away their children or seizing their home.

Now, in rather startling news, it’s been discovered that the occupants of the White House in Washington, DC have been secretly manufacturing recreational drugs, and even have a staff of specialists to work on it.

Apparently, this has been going on since last January, but they’ve managed to escape discovery so long by sharing with only a select few.

Only special guests have sampled White House homebrew.

As the lights are still on, it appears that the power has not yet been cut to the White House, and no word has been forthcoming from law enforcement and social agencies as to whether Malia Anne and Natasha will be placed in foster homes or whether forfeiture proceedings have begun on the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue property.

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52 Responses to Indoor drug lab discovered at White House

  1. Cannabis says:

    Obviously the Sidwell Friends School doesn’t have a very good D.A.R.E. officer or the kids would have turned Mom & Dad in already.

  2. Francis says:

    Uh oh, I think I know how this is going to end. It’s a shame, really. Bo seemed like such a sweet dog…

  3. strayan says:

    Outrageous! Think of the children!

    Children who live at or visit these sites or are present during drug production face acute health and safety risks, including physical, emotional, and sexual abuse and medical neglect. The manufacture of methamphetamine ethanol may involve hazards such as fires and explosions.

    http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/publications/bulletins/children/197590.pdf

    Two dead in winery explosion

    It is believed workmen who came from the winery were using welding equipment when ethanol vapours contained in a large metal tank ignited and exploded, destroying the winery.

    http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2008/01/17/1200419930080.html

    A child living at a clandestine methamphetamine ethanol laboratory is exposed to immediate dangers and to the ongoing effects of chemical contamination. In addition, the child may be subjected to fires and explosions, abuse and neglect, a hazardous lifestyle (including the presence of firearms), social problems, and other risks.

    http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/publications/bulletins/children/pg5.html

    • Peter says:

      Just to complete the parallel:
      “… abuse and neglect, a hazardous lifestyle (including the presence of firearms), social problems, and other risks.” Sounds just like the risks faced by children in households where ethanol is abused.

  4. darkcycle says:

    Also, clandestine drug labs are hazardous waste sites. How did they hide the guys in Environmental suits carrying out box after box of old soda bottles and half used cleaning supplies? And what about the neighbors…certainly the OTHER house in the neighborhood was put at risk…

  5. Sarah Derner says:

    Good Lord, what a bunch of losers you all are — lighten up for Godsakes it’s just beer!

    • Furball says:

      It seems to me that you’ve forgotten the lessons learned from Prohibition. Please look at some of the links on the left-hand side of the screen to re-educate, and understand how this is indeed linked to the hypocritical, modern-day War on (Some) Drugs (That Old, White People Don’t Like). Thank you, and please comment here more often.

    • darkcycle says:

      Alcohol and alcohol related accidents are significant contributors to annual mortality in this country, Sarah. Marijuana, not so much, ya know what I mean? Yet the Government would violently invade my home in the middle of the night, putting everyone, including neighbors at risk, were they to SUSPECT that I was merely growing a plant. The posters here think that is funny. Not funny ha-ha, but funny ironic and wrong. We’ve all had personal experience, or know somebody who has had personal experience with this policy.
      Just so we’re clear….THEY WILL KILL YOU OVER A F@#KING PLANT you have growing in your house. Doesn’t it seem a little perversely ironic that the President can make home brew in his basement?
      Nope. Not gonna lighten up. And I’m feelin’ pissy tonight too.

    • DdC says:

      It’s them fucking Humans! Or at least their inventions from dead things, like Beer. Or things they kill. All inventions are from dead things. Fermentation by micro organisms digesting rotting vegetation and fruits. Yummy. So the ethanol produced is purposely poured into the humans to change their blood, to retard necessary essential elements to act human. Depriving the brain of these elements causing temporary insanity and violence and confusion. For this they pay lots of money and pollute lots of air, dirt and water on the infrastructure. Twins in bikini’s sell beer during supperbowls to idiot drunk kids with no chance of getting the twins. Who are back stage getting high with the stoners. Who picked a flower, dried it and that’s it.

      Alcohol and alcohol related accidents are significant contributors to annual mortality in this country.

      Nobody’s perfect. They win more profits treating booze related incidents than lose to the cemetery biz. Plus the infrastructure of the booze/drug biz not with chewing coca or toking a spliff. Road rage and bar fights bring ER visits so the poor kids there without health care can get educated to the future. Cops work for the DA who’s goal is to win. Justice is like Health and Peace. Nice concept but no money in it. It’s like Cures and Prevention steal profits from “Treatment”. Punish them! More income tax from caging a stoner than working at Burger Christ. Even more better than the King or the Clown. Cigarettes are another evil necessity. Tobacco doesn’t do harm, or it hasn’t for thousands of years no different than smoking Ganja for thousands of years without any knowledge of harm. Adulterated cigarettes provide taxes and the new prohibitions springing up has already provided a billion dollar black market. Plus driving cost up leaves the poor with generic brands with even more poisons. Providing more parents of kids in ER’s due to no health insurance potentially preventing “treatment”. The Babylonians are on their knees to Ba’al’s Money God Geeeeeezus. It’s all in how you look at it.

      Bummer
      Barack Obama turns out to be just another drug warrior.

      A trillion dollars wasted on the Ganjawar is a trillion dollars in corporate and kop pockets. War is good to Haliburton. The Ganjawar is good to Exxon since nixon lumped Hemp into the CSA. Ford made Biomass cars as Diesels ran on vegetable oil. Farmers distilled their own ethanol from crop remnants before Rockefeller and Hearst injected money and propaganda to provide us the 19th amendment. After the 21st amendment repealing the 19th. People could drink, taverns could sell it. Distributors could transport it. Counties could opt out and become dry. But the only prohibition left was farmers distilling their own tractor and heating fuel and cars now ran on Rockefellers crude oil gasoline and diesel. Nixon got little press about the Controlled Substance Act. Or his rejecting his own Shaffer Commission report rejecting Cannabis as a schedule#1 narcotic. Including medicinal and hemp, never prohibited by the 1937 tax act. Not many realized the “truce” in the drug war between Leary’s court decision on 5th amendment grounds and the implementing of the CSA. Not many heard about the CSA whisking it through the legislature behind the roar of Watergate headlines. Meaning Woodward and Burnstein were saps or conspirators. With the media programming what we see and hear is there anything off the debate table? Just ask a nurse about the cannabinoid system. It’s true toto, we aren’t in Kansas anymore.

      Al Capone and Watergate were red herrings to divert the countries attention from the Fascist acts of eliminating competition. Booze/Ethanol or Ganja//Hemp.

    • Pete says:

      Thank you Sarah, for the perfect comment. Sure, the sarcasm and irony completely went over your head (although anyone should have been able to figure out that we weren’t really calling for the White House property to be seized because of beer)

      But what a great statement!

      Good Lord, what a bunch of losers you all are — lighten up for Godsakes it’s just beer!

      Exactly. What a bunch of losers are anyone who would care whether you grow something in your own home? And lighten up for Godsakes it’s just a plant!

      And yet. And yet, the current occupant of the White House is sending thugs in flack jackets, automatic rifles and battering rams into the homes of people who are really no different than him, merely because they’re manufacturing their own drug which is arguably safer than beer.

      People are losing their electricity… and their children… and their homes.

      Of course the President should be home brewing. That’s a great idea. But to do that while knowing that thousands of people are arrested every day for doing something just as innocent… something that he did when he was younger… that makes him a hypocrite. And that’s the point of this post.

      • Matthew Meyer says:

        I think Sarah out-ironied the ironizers. Guys, hang out at Reason.com more, you won’t get caught by these things!

        😉

        • Francis says:

          Or maybe THEY were also being ironic and YOU got out-ironized. That’s what so damn tricky about the whole thing. What if the irony, like turtles, goes all the way down? 🙂

    • Francis says:

      I threw a “thumbs up” her way for providing us with a “teachable moment.” Also do we really need comments like that “hidden”? I ALWAYS click-through to see them. Doesn’t everyone? It reminds me of those hidden camera “white lie” experiments where the researchers tell children not to look through a viewfinder, in a box, etc. and then leave the room.

      “In Study 2, 3- and 5-year-olds were asked not to look in a box to identify its contents. Almost all children looked, most denied having looked, and a minority consistently feigned ignorance of the contents.”

      (Hmm… why does it feel like there might be a drug war analogy there somewhere?)

    • Duncan20903 says:

      .
      .
      “Come on, Sandy baby, loosen up. You’re too tight” said a drunken John Riggins to Justice Sandra Day O’Conner, just before passing out drunk on the floor.

      By then, according to an Associated Press report, most of the guests at his table agreed, Riggins had done his part to liven the Washington Press Club’s annual salute to Congress, which drew more than 1,000 journalists and local celebrities to the Washington Sheraton Wednesday night.

      http://www.nytimes.com/1985/02/01/sports/sports-people-livening-party-he-was-high-spirits-during-cocktail-hour-time-soup.html

      …and they say it’s silly to worry about cannabis being criminalized. Sheesh!

  6. Jhelion says:

    Sarah, we will gladly lighten up after the prohibs do.

  7. claygooding says:

    Sharon,,,beer being brewed by the man that promised change,,,and doesn’t even have spare change.

    Exposing Marijuana Myths: A Review of the Scientific Evidence

    http://www.marijuana.com/myths/

  8. Francis says:

    Looks like some guy named “Ron Paul” won first in the California GOP straw poll. Wild. I wonder if he’ll ever break into the “top tier.”

  9. Francis says:

    Pete, I think a similar hypocrisy was on display at Obama’s much-hyped “Beer Summit.” Also, if your goal is to use a mind-altering substance to bring people together for purposes of resolving conflict, alcohol seems like a pretty strange choice given its prominent role in, you know, fueling conflict. Has the guy never heard of empathogens? I mean, an “MDMA Summit” would have actually made sense. (Plus the inevitable pictures of the Obama/Gates/Crowley back rub circle would have been awesome!)

    • Francis says:

      It just occurred to me that the physics of a three-man back rub “circle” might be tricky. They’d probably need to bring in Biden and say, Eric Holder, to round things out. (It would, of course, be great if they could get ol’ Gil to participate, but I think he’d be a tough sale.)

    • Peter says:

      Thanks for reminding us about the beer summit…. the Henry Louis Gates affair was the first crack in Obama’s cool handling of the media and an indication of how conventional his thinking really was. His pathetic attempt to relate to Sgt Crowley on the Joe Sixpack level just reinforces the complete absence of any original thinking on his part. In Britain he’d be somewhere to the right of the Conservative Party and he’s terrified of upsetting conservative American voters by appearing “soft on drugs.” Don’t expect any change here.

  10. Peter says:

    Sarah….please do come back on this thread, I’d love to hear your response to the above replies to your first post, particularly those of Pete and Darkcycle. I’m going to give you a thumbs up because i don’t like to see such an interesting comment hidden by the numbers.

  11. ezrydn says:

    On a tangent to the story, anyone believe Obama would have the cajones to go back continuously to retrieve fallen brothers? Do you honestly feel he’d come back for YOU??

  12. Matthew Meyer says:

    My 2 cents: rating comments on drugwarrant is weird.

    • Francis says:

      At the very least, there should be a third button to signal an “emotionally conflicted” reaction.

    • darkcycle says:

      At this point, I kinda like the “like” buttons. Because it’s mostly just us here, they sort of take the place of the nods, head shakes and grunts that actually make up the bulk of human communication. We can’t make funny faces at each other, so the little buttons take their place.

      • Francis says:

        Yeah, I’ve come around on the “like” buttons as well. But what do you mean by: “Because it’s mostly just us here….”? Come on, man. Don’t otherize the opposition. (After all, that’s what THEY do.) 🙂

    • DudlyDavonport says:

      Yes, please remove it completely, it adds nothing!

    • Pete says:

      I didn’t realize that a down-rated post would get “hidden” — seems unproductive for us, so I’ve changed the settings to make that harder to do.

      And I’m taking all the feedback into consideration on the Like and Dislike buttons. So far, it seems split between those who dislike and those who like the like and dislike buttons, but it may also be a bit of a temporary novelty. Let’s give it a week or two and see how we feel.

      • darkcycle says:

        Pete, we could vote! You could just write a comment with a single word:
        “Buttons”?
        Then we vote up or down!

        • DudlyDavonport says:

          Possible text for Pete’s button referendum:

          Do you wish to see the back of these very silly buttons?

      • Emma says:

        I think the yellow highlighting of the up-rated comments is distracting. Maybe if it was a different color or a lighter shade of yellow. The pink and gray highlighting doesn’t bother me in the same way for some reason.

        Also the little green and red hands would be less visually intrusive if they were a lighter shade, or maybe not colored at all (as they become after they are clicked).

      • tintguy says:

        thumbs up on the buttons

  13. Peter says:

    Looks like Sarah may have a facebook page….if it’s the same Sarah she declares that “I’m not a bitch, i just have a low tollerence for bullshit.”

  14. escapegoat says:

    I don’t get to legally consume my favorite drugs, but the president of the country i live in uses taxpayer dollars to produce his drugs……………….

  15. allan says:

    well, ummm… a low tolerance for BS around here won’t work, it flows far too regularly for that… never from me of course. Funny thread so far.

    Sunday cookies, 1/4 batch with green butter. Yummm…

    So here’s a Sunday musing for ya… if hemp seeds are exceptionally nutritious would good, top grade ganja seeds be even more nutritious/healthy? It seems to this old joint-roller that sinsemilla is great and all but I really, really miss seeds. Maybe not some of that ’70s Mescan that pound for pound was more seed than stem and bud/leaf combined… but you know, a few seeds now and again is a good thing. I always gave my exotic seeds to a grower that was summering here in OR. His faves were Thai seeds.

    I’m still looking for that Dr Atomic watermelon sized seed… Jack and the Hempstalk indeed.

    If Smokey the Bear took off his smokey-the-bear hat would he have dreads underneath? Why then DO they call him “Smokey”? Could he have originally said “make sure that pipe’s out, dead out.” I mean really… a walking, talking bear? With a shovel? Where’s his roll of irrigation line?

    And not to give away the plot to the new prologue Planet of the Apes but it’s those pesky Pharmaceutical Corps making the world better for us again… (loved seeing John Lithgow in this)

    • darkcycle says:

      Hey Pete…is there a “Huh?” button?

    • Francis says:

      I thought the new Planet of the Apes was actually pretty good. And I love James Franco. But James Franco as the cutting-edge research scientist who discovers the cure for Alzheimer’s? That may have exceeded my capacity for willing suspension of disbelief. (The rest of the plot I had no problem with.) I think he was probably better suited to his roles in Pineapple Express and Her Highness (both solid.)

  16. allan says:

    it was pretty good, for a Planet of the Apes movie. And I love my sci-fi (I was a kid in the ’50s and ’60s), there’s just not enough good science/speculative fiction film done. Perhaps because it often requires thinking and occasional deep mental cud chewing.

    • darkcycle says:

      Even when Hollywood attempts the good stuff, they get it all wrong, dumb it down beyond tolerance, and generally hack the s**t out of it. Witness “Starship Troopers”.

      • Pete says:

        I actually liked Starship Troopers and thought it did a pretty good job of attempting Heinlein’s non-realistic presentation of the propaganda of war while still being true to the pulp sci-fi story.

      • darkcycle says:

        I gotta differ there. Heinlein’s depth was glossed over, don’t get me wrong, I don’t subscribe to Heinein’s world view, he was messed up, but he was brilliant.

  17. Ron Combs says:

    There goes the neighborhood

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