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Busy times for politicians

Chuck Schumer wants to ban the latest media-fueled drug craze: “bath salts.”

As long as we have prohibition for drugs like marijuana, there will be a lucrative market for legal (and possibly dangerous) alternatives, and technologically savvy opportunists will create new ones faster than the idiot politicians can ban them.

And what about all the other things that haven’t been banned yet? When I was in High School, two kids died from huffing kerosene. When is Schumer going to ban kerosene?

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12 comments to Busy times for politicians

  • Bruce

    I fear someone may mistake their gun for their cellphone. Time to ban both. Somebody could lose an eye. Aquariums could be damaged and fish hurt. Honeybees could resume proper navigation to and from the flowers.

    Keys are also dangerous in the wrong hands. All keys should be made of silicone rubber to prevent vandalism to automobiles and blockages of drainpipes.
    Teeth and Dentures are a worry too, someone could get bitten. Teeth are a genetic flaw and should be removed at the earliest sign of development. A kinder gentler Human race is possible. Merit badges could be created and awarded monthly for peaceful deeds and gum control. A gummy crowd is a chummy crowd.

  • malcolm kyle

    Thanks Pete for showing me where to post my new boiler-plate:

    We all have our victories and defeats as regards fear, but most of us strive not to let fear rule our hearts or our choices. Being free means being free to live and love as if death had no power over us. It is our ethical and moral duty to expose blind hate and ignorance by shining eternal light and love, sending fear and hatred fleeing back to the shadows from whence it came.

    We explore outer space with various forms of space craft, but many choose to explore inner space via nature’s abundant chemistry – an infinite journey into the heart of God. Whatever, we are here to explore this glorious universe. The Prohibitionist’s brand of hateful, choking pseudo-Conservatism is the antithesis of all that. Like a lion who cannot grasp that he can do more than walk in a circle the size of the cage he’s been freed from, the prohibitionist is incapable of exploration beyond the boundaries of his own fear, prejudice and loathing. We are all free to choose how we walk our own path, but when we choose to go beyond this by supporting drug-war demagoguery, to the point of even threatening others with imprisonment and physical violence, we loose the right to expect any form of respect from the once free and prosperous society that we are helping to totally destroy.

    We’re about to lose all semblance of that once ordered, prosperous and safe society. Myself, along with many others, have been debating prohibitionists on this for many years. We have shown what destruction prohibition has wrought on all the civil institutions of this once great nation, -we’ve always provided facts & statistics – they have countered with either lies, personal abuse or even serious threats of violence.

    Ending the insanity of drug prohibition by legalized regulation, respecting the rights of the responsible users and focusing on addiction as a sickness, like we do with alcohol and tobacco, will save the U.S. economy and countless lives and livelihoods. Prohibition continues unabated for shameful political reasons. It cannot, and never will, reduce drug use or addiction.

  • ezrydn

    Save a lot of trouble and ban Schumer!

  • darkcycle

    Idiocy is the default.

  • DdC

    Ban Fossil Fools for the Sake of the Children huffing it!

    Probably more kids harmed by the bathwater than the salts added to it. Lets ban political chicken littles. Lets ban New York. Lets ban bans!

  • Sick........!

    Just ban life and there will be no risk or decisions to make…there by protecting the public.

  • InsanityRules

    When I was a teen in the 70’s, even when drugs were cheap and plentiful, we used to get a great headrush from hyperventilating, then having a friend grab us from behind and squeeze us below the diaphragm so we would get light-headed from the lack of oxygen.

    From this experience I think we should ban breathing, friends, arms, diaphragms and perhaps oxygen. While we’re at it, we should solve the energy crisis and global warming by banning friction and gravity. We have about as much chance legislating the laws of physics as we do overruling economics. Either one is the ultimate exercise in legislative arrogance!

  • denmark

    Let’s ban all bans.

    Gawd, I really hate the political process and where it’s landed.

  • Windy

    Schumer is an authoritarian, statist, drug war idiot who would rule every aspect of your private life if he could get away with it.

  • Duncan20903

    .
    .
    Oh Pete, you’ve made me recall a fellow who used to live in Manassass VA back in the 1980s. Affectionately dubbed “Hi Test” and beloved by the local throwaway “news”paper, his chosen profession utilized cardboard signs and squeegees at traffic intersections, and his thing was sniffing gasoline to get high. You’d always see him with a gas can in hand or if not could be assured that it was close by and handy.

    In his newspaper interviews he noted that he found gasoline the superior inhalant for enjoyment and relaxation, and was pleased that he could get high all day for less than fifty cents. Alas, poor Manassass lost a big piece of its local color when Mr. Test passed away. We were all shocked to learn that it was from an obscure disease called “benzene poisoning”. We had all expected that one day he would blow himself up when one of his ever present cigarettes got too close to his headstash, but it turned out to be the result of a garden variety drug overdose.

    In another example of how drug use isn’t a “victimless” crime, the local throwaway folded up shop not too long afterward, having lost too much circulation. I don’t think there were many who didn’t believe that it was from being deprived of having Mr. Test to interview every month. All those jobs lost, because one degenerate decided to huff gasoline.

    RIP Mr. Test.