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DrugWarRant.com, the longest running single-issue blog devoted to drug policy, is published by the Prohibition Isn't Free Foundation
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April 2004
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Happy 420

Today might be a day to read something fun, so I thought I’d point out one of my older satire articles — if you’re a recent visitor to Drug WarRant, you may not have seen this before. So move ahead to the year 2043 and the government’s war on burgers.

Stupid DEA tricks

From the Sun News in Myrtle Beach, SC:

You have to admire the gumption of the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration and its associates in the Horry County, Atlantic Beach and North Myrtle Beach police departments. Officers from the agencies came up dry Thursday in their drug-paraphernalia raid on the 4:20 Superstore in Atlantic Beach, having apparently been given bum information. At that point, most other government folks ( a line of work not known for creativity ) would have said, “Well, that didn’t work out,” and left the scene.

Instead, the drug agents said, “Hey, we have those drug-sniffing dogs from the NMB canine unit with us. As long as we’re here, why not search some cars at random?” Not even the knowledge that the U.S. Supreme Court is considering a case with potential to ban warrantless, no-probable-cause random canine searches of motor vehicles could deter these intrepid law enforcers from seeking something to show for their efforts.

The random searching of cars netted the DEA three arrests (and hopefully three lawsuits) as a result of this clearly illegal fishing expedition. [Note to DEA. Add “reading the constitution” to the training of DEA agents.]