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March 2012
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Gateway theory

DirecTV has a series of ads that essentially parody the gateway theory (although they may not realize it themselves). Here’s my favorite:

  • When you have cable and can’t record all your shows, you feel unhappy.
  • When you feel unhappy, you go to happy hour.
  • When you go to happy hour, you’re up for anything.
  • When you’re up for anything, you head to a Turkish Bathhouse.
  • When you head to a Turkish Bathhouse, you meet Charlie Sheen.
  • And, when you meet Charlie Sheen, you reenact scenes from “Platoon” with Charlie Sheen.
  • Don’t reenact scenes from “Platoon” with Charlie Sheen. Get rid of cable and upgrade to DirecTV.

Hey, every single person I know who has reenacted scenes from “Platoon” with Charlie Sheen started with being unable to record all their shows. It must be true!!!

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4 comments to Gateway theory

  • Matthew Meyer

    You got them drug goggles on, Pete. Extraordinarily, I also witnessed those ads. But I didn’t make the connection, which is right on. Another one goes: unhappy–>seminar–>Las Vegas–>somehow shamefully drunk in public (I forget the detail). Funny how people make jokes about alcohol and nobody freaks out.

    • Francis

      “Funny how people make jokes about alcohol and nobody freaks out.”

      That is so very true.

      When you go to happy hour, you’re up for anything.

      Get it? You’re “up for anything” when you drink because alcohol is a massively impairing disinhibitor that promotes risk-taking behavior and poor decision making. Those effects account for a sizable chunk of the 75,000 alcohol-related deaths that occur in the U.S. each year. Funny stuff, right?

  • Maria

    That one’s my favorite. It’s so ridiculously funny and absurd. Much like the gateway theory itself.

  • Jake

    – When you read Pete’s blog you learn
    – When you learn you question
    – When you question you realise
    – When you realise you speak out
    – When you speak out you are considered a threat
    – When you are considered a threat you are ridiculed
    – When you are ridiculed you push harder
    – When you push harder more people question
    – When more people question a consensus builds
    – When a consensus builds we reach a tipping point
    – When we reach a tipping point we can see the end of the drug war.

    Stop listening to the government on drugs – read, learn, question and speak out.

    🙂