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March 2004
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And the stupid town award goes to….

A picture named seabrook.jpg
…Seabrook, New Hampshire, which voted 1,521 to 464 for a new town ordinance requiring regular mandatory drug and alcohol testing of all town employees to be done at the local hospital.
Now they’re having to face the consequences of their action, which include:

  • All volunteers are considered employees, so included in the drug and alcohol testing will be volunteer members of the Planning Board and the Budget Committee, and those who volunteer to coach teams or teach in the Seabrook Recreation Department.
  • All union contracts in the town will have to be renegotiated to include testing or the contracts will not be legal.
  • The Selectmen position is officially considered a 24-hour a day job. This may mean that they are never allowed to drink.
  • Each test costs $40-$50, but no budget provision was made for the testing expense,
  • The hospital plans on conducting the tests and charging for them, but not releasing the results of the tests to the town, since that would violate doctor-patient confidentiality laws. Apparently the new town ordinance only called for testing and didn’t cover what was to be done with the tests.

Consider Seabrook, New Hampshire for your next vacation. Enjoy the sea, and the brooks, and be entertained by all the resident idiots. Just think of them as part of a carnival sideshow. Besides, they need your tourism dollars to pay for their drug and alcohol tests.

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